The Ten Commandments of Driving in New York City

1. Thou shalt not find a parking space.

2. Thou shalt not remember the use of thine turn signal.

3. Thou shalt cross doublets of yellow lines at will, with neither rhyme nor reason.

4. Thou shalt consider the right lane of a four-lane street to be of thine own use for temporary parking.

5. Thou shalt back up traffic in the left lane of a four-lane street whilst thou art attempting to turn in an intersection.

6. Thou shalt veer, weave, and swerve around those vehicles temporarily parked in the right lane and stopped in the left. Thou shalt be mindful of Commandment Two.

7. Thou shalt not drive into Manhattan on pain of loss of bank account and happiness.

8. Thou shalt despise the fire hydrant, the bane of thine existence when thou art searching for a parking space. Thou shalt be mindful of Commandment One.

9. Thou shalt obtain estimated travel time from Google, and thou shalt multiply thy estimate thrice.

10. Thou shalt travel by subway.